Page 1 of 3
Chuck Norris Facts (And Fanclub)
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 3:55 pm
by Brownmetal
Post all of your Chuck Norris Facts.
I'll start:
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Chuck Norris FTW
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 4:08 pm
by Druska
Chuck Norris has two speeds: To walk and To kill.
Whereas many persons use a pajamas of superman, Superman uses Chuck Norris's pajamas.
Before he forgot a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real
cuck norris vs bruce lee
<object><param></param><param></param><embed src="
http://www.youtube.com/v/JLO1YIWQuXE&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>
top 10 chuck norris
<object><param></param><param></param><embed src="
http://www.youtube.com/v/n8QAeoFdM5g&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 4:10 pm
by HilgaMan
Brownmetal wrote:Post all of your Chuck Norris Facts.
I'll start:
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Chuck Norris FTW
Well, I'm not personally a big fan of Chuck Norris but thats was just AWESOME! HILARIOUS! SUPERB!
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 6:06 pm
by budgie
bruce lee > chuck norris
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:14 pm
by Janet
budgie wrote:bruce lee > chuck norris
Chuck pwns Bruce Lee anytime. Face it.
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:20 pm
by Brownmetal
janetvaher wrote:budgie wrote:bruce lee > chuck norris
Chuck pwns Bruce Lee anytime. Face it.
Infact, when Bruce Lee saw Chuck Norris, Bruce Lee kept pissing his pants till they ripped and then he flooded the whole apartment building, which was a whole 25 floors. Luckily, Chuck Norris didn't get piss on him, but the piss got Chuck Norris.
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:29 pm
by Dylan
ive got a bunch that aren't posted yet.... i just need time to post dat shit.
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:31 pm
by Jonny
There's over 300 of these.
Have fun.
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 9:04 pm
by playker
-Chuck Norris requested a Big Mac when he was in a Burger King and they made one for him
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 9:27 pm
by BrandonCorey
Chuck Norris is a faggot and can lick my ass.
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 9:30 pm
by playker
BrandonCorey wrote:Chuck Norris is a faggot and can lick my ass.
chuck is going to kick your ass maaan, so don't mess with him
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:02 pm
by TomiT14
BrandonCorey wrote:Chuck Norris is a faggot and can lick my ass.
Chuck would say
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:10 pm
by Gibsum 41
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, he decides what time it is
When Chuck Norris touches water he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norrised
Chuck Norris won the lottery without having to buy a ticket
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's butter
A gun cant shoot without Chuck Norris's autorization
Chuck Norris is so cool he froze hell
In the bible Christ turned water into wine, Chuck Norris turned water into beer
Chuck Norris was the first man to touch the sun
Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:12 pm
by Jonny
Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 4:06 am
by Gibsum 41
TomiT14 wrote:BrandonCorey wrote:Chuck Norris is a faggot and can lick my ass.
Chuck would say
is that person next to chuck a guy or a woman
Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 4:23 am
by BrandonCorey
TomiT14 wrote:BrandonCorey wrote:Chuck Norris is a faggot and can lick my ass.
Chuck would say
haha that's funny
Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 4:33 am
by Spencer
chuck norris kicks ass
Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 8:04 pm
by Mr-David-Blues
There was once a Chuck Norris toilet paper
But it wouldnt take shit from anyone
Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:53 pm
by K.
k enough! i'll open anti-chuck norris facts(and fanclub
)
Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 11:27 pm
by Gibsum 41
YOU MONSTER!!!
