A new song i wrote, after like a week or more of a total writer's bloack i guess haha, b-cuz of this chick... this song is about her.
[Verse 1]
Even though I tried to forget you
I can't live like that
When I try not to think about you
I... fuckin' can't
I know you're so far away
Not even thinking of me
But ever since this damn monday
I think of you and just can't see!
[chorus]
I! feel so far!
So far away!
Away from you!
You! I wanted you!
And I thought!
We'll make it through!
[Verse 2]
Still, you're in my mind
All i want...
Is to be with you, and hold you tight
Hear you laughing, see you smiling
Look at your cute face
Feel like i'm dreaming
[Chorus]
[Interlude]
You, you changed me... totally! amazingly!
You, you didn't know... the impact you had on me!
[Guitar solo]
[Interlude 2]
You, took over my dreams
I can't believe
You, you don't know
how you're important to me
Will you ever know or its a fantasy?
[Chorus x2/3]
[Outro]
Hope you liked!
Away from You [a song i wrote]
- Hentaiman
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Away from You [a song i wrote]
Last edited by Hentaiman on Sat Apr 26, 2008 11:27 am, edited 1 time in total.
- withchappedlips
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Re: Away from You [a song i wrote]
It sounds like a song that could be pretty catchy in the future if it had music around it.
but I know I can't be comfortable in my own skin.
So when I say I'm scared to be alone, you know I mean it,
I'm just not ready to leave my room.
[donate][/donate]
- Hentaiman
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Re: Away from You [a song i wrote]
Yeah, i'm kinda thinking about some tunes for it now. I hope it'll work out well.Kyle_ftl wrote:It sounds like a song that could be pretty catchy in the future if it had music around it.
- wiggs1441
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Re: Away from You [a song i wrote]
its ok
tomhoppus is my Master!
NoReason27 is my Grand-master!
BrandonCorey is my N00B!
Sum-42 is my Grand N00B!
NoReason27 is my Grand-master!
BrandonCorey is my N00B!
Sum-42 is my Grand N00B!
- Hentaiman
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Re: Away from You [a song i wrote]
Could i possibly get more comments?
and more of where can i improve it and such, and not that just "its ok" or stuff, if possible. thanx :D
and more of where can i improve it and such, and not that just "its ok" or stuff, if possible. thanx :D
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- Hooch
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Re: Away from You [a song i wrote]
I think it's good! the only thing I would say is the "I....fuckin can't!" seems a little corny from the lyrics alone, I guess it would depend on the music with it. but other then that, good job!
- Hentaiman
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Re: Away from You [a song i wrote]
^
Thanx for the late comment, man.
Thanx for the late comment, man.
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- Hooch
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Re: Away from You [a song i wrote]
yep no problem
Re: Away from You [a song i wrote]
it seems good, i'd like to hear it, to see how the words go, but overall its a decent song, well structured, etc :)